I wish I had made up that headline, but it is actually one of my favorite Homer Simpson quotes.

Frankly, it is how I am feeling today. I did a stupid thing. I read about melanoma on the internet this morning. It’s a miracle I haven’t until now, but now the damage is done. After yesterday’s brief light, I find I am right back down in the funks. According to the website, Melanoma International Foundation, I have stage III melanoma. Treatment looks like it is going to be a serious bitch. At least a year long, and it says I’ll be feeling pretty much like serious shit the entire time. And then there are no promises. Melanoma sucks.

Sorry for the mood swing, everyone, but I think you can pretty much count on them here for a while. I’m trying to deal. I really am. I think the best advice I can give myself now is to simply wait until I meet with Dr. Kashani at UCSF next week. He will be able to tell me exactly where I stand and what I might expect in the coming year. Right now I am letting my imagination run away with me.

Shit! This waiting sucks.

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