It is funny how the music of our youth can have such a powerful hold on us in our later years. Speaking for myself, I would say that many of my favorite songs are the songs that were played on the radio between 1979 and 1984. Maybe that’s not the most notable period for musical artistry, but what can I say? I’m a product of my times. My theory is that a person’s formative musical period lasts five years, and then, while some new material might sneak in in the ensuing years, it never really has the power of music during your five year block.

While I’ve shared this theory with my friends over the years, it really hasn’t occurred to me until today that the same might hold true for a person’s style of humor. I mention this because, through the power of YouTube, I have become reacquainted with the brilliant T.V. show, Taxi. And, while watching the clips I’ve included below, I came to the conclusion that there is nothing on television today that is anywhere near as funny as this show, at least to me. Read More...

Well, I’m not sure what to make of this. I received this email earlier in the month and I’m passing it along here for your perusal. It is an invitation from a casting person for the show Supernanny. Now I’ll say right here that I have watched, and benefited from watching Supernanny. I think she is awesome. But lets face it, it is no secret that they find parents who are doing a “less than stellar” job so Supernanny can work her magic. It makes for the best “Before and After” shots for the television program. I understand that. But this email specifically solicits SINGLE DADS.

I think I see the angle....”Oh those poor helpless single dads. They let their kids sit in front of the T.V. all day. They cook them frozen dinners. They’re too busy on their cell phones to help them at the playground. Good thing Supernanny arrives just in time to save the day.”

Maybe that is the angle. Or maybe that is just my paranoia kicking in, I don’t know. At any rate, if any of you single dads are interested in being on the show, shoot me an email and I will pass on the contact info.

Did any of you other single parent bloggers get this email? Was it spit out from a form mailer?

Here is the email I received...

Jim,
I am contacting you from the casting department of the show “Supernanny” on ABC. We are currently casting for Season 5, and I thought some of your readers (other single dads) might be interested in applying for the show.
We are sending a casting producer to your area soon to meet with families, so we are trying to spread the word now for people to apply. I’d love to send you more information and give you more details, so please don’t hesitate to contact me using the contact info below.
Thanks,
Candra Nazzaro

My mother told me that I was the easiest child to care for (compared to my older brother and sister) at least when it came to visiting her friends. She often told the story of how once, visiting her friend while my siblings were in school, she handed me a small piece of celery which I then went on to push around the kitchen floor for two hours pretending it was a car.

Call it self sufficiency, call it good imagination, or call it Asperger Syndrome, what ever it was, I had it. And, I like to think that, to some extent, I still do. My hero, Wittgenstein, called it “making your own oxygen.” And I think it is a prerequisite for happiness.

I’m reminded of this because I’ve noticed lately that Oliver and Amélie have been relying on me to structure every minute of their day. As soon as they have finished solving a puzzle, playing a game, drawing a picture, watching a video, or going for a walk, they invariably ask, “What can I do now, Papa?” And I think I must be getting a bit remiss in trying to show them how to make their own oxygen. I can’t remember a single time as a child ever needing my parents to suggest something to do. I had a playroom packed with toys and I spent many golden afternoons playing there.

So I am curious about this quality. Is it an innate attitude or is it something that can be taught? Is it a symptom of this generation of video fed children? Oliver and Amélie have a room full of toys and they just sit there. They get engaged if I join them on the floor, but they really do rely on me to “set the script” for the kind of play we do. I do enjoy this, and I’m happy to oblige, but lately I have my doubts about how much I should be leading the way here.

For the record, Oliver and Amélie are 7 and 6. I’d love to hear from readers with older children who might have some insight as to whether this is an age thing, a personality thing, or a learned behavior.

. . . . . . . . . .

Well I saw my radiologist today. I wanted to talk to her about some sores on my neck and jawline that appeared shortly after radiation treatment in November and they have shown very little sign of healing. She examined me and I got a new prescription to help it. But it will still be slow going because, also today, my interferon kit arrived via UPS. And, as my oncologist told me, interferon basically brings all skin healing to a stop. So will I have these sores for the eleven months I will be taking interferon? Time will tell.

My radiologist also told me that, since I still have not regained control of my lower right lip by now, it is unlikely I will ever get control of it again. This is only a bummer for me because it means I will have a lopsided smile for the rest of my life, and I will continue to bite it when opening my mouth to eat sandwiches and stuff.

But it is all a matter of perspective in the end. And I am not complaining. My radiologist told me today that there was a woman who was diagnosed with pretty much the exact same thing I had and at the same time. Actually, my radiologist had just come from an appointment with her. And the fact of the matter is, she is not likely to survive the week.

Knowing that that could have been my fate this week is a sobering realization to say the least.

. . . . . . . . . .

A few days ago I had an extraordinary dream. I don’t usually remember my dreams, or when I do, I remember them as a mishmash of images and emotions. But every now and then, I have dreams that are continuous in their narrative flow. And that was the case with this particular dream. I also recall it as one of the longest dreams I’ve had, though the passage of time is tricky to measure with dreams. Sometimes scenes segue directly into each other, and the dreamer is left with only the feeling of the amount of time that has passed between them.

I’ll also say that this dream was filled with compelling imagery. And in recounting it here, it is impossible to convey the emotions that the scenes evoked in me. Dreams can fill a person with overwhelming feelings of profundity and yet a mere two days later it can be hard to recall what all the fuss was about. Such was the case here. Read More...

Well, the beat goes on. I just wanted to document these last remaining items in the ongoing story of Depot Dad vs. the DMV.

When I returned to the DMV, after clearing my Arizona driving record, I was asked to take a written test. This has never happened to me before and I wasn’t prepared for it. But I stood at the testing table and answered as best as I could. I felt pretty confident about all of the questions except one. It asked, “When you are convicted of a DUI, what sentence are you likely to receive? A. $500 fine B. 6 month suspension of license C. 12 month suspension of license.” I thought about it for a minute. “This is a ridiculous question! It has nothing to do with driving competency. It is only testing me on my familiarity with public policy. How in the hell should I know? I made a guess (C.) and turned in my test.

And, of course, this is the one question I got wrong. The woman reviewing the answers said, “Don’t feel bad. You probably aren’t a drinker.”
“Well, no. I’m not. At least when I know I’ll be driving! What a stupid question.” (The correct answer was B. by the way)
“Well, she answered, it is the reason I take a bike to work.”
What? Are you telling me you got a DUI conviction?”
“Yes,” she answered.
“Let me get this straight. I can’t renew a driver’s license because of a twenty year old jaywalking ticket, but the DMV will let someone with an active DUI conviction correct the driving tests.
“Yes.” She said.

I had already mentioned in my last post on this matter that I got my insurance policy paperwork in the mail even before the company knew I had a valid license. Well the laughs kept coming the following day when I received a packet in the mail from the insurance company begging me to come back to them as a customer. Clearly the sales department was not talking to the marketing department. The packet contained all sorts of deals for reduced rates on my policy IF I returned to them. I did not fail to note that I received NONE of these deals when I renewed my policy over the phone the previous week!

So now I sit with an important question....

Should I stir the pot and call the insurance company and ask for these discounts? They are not trivial. And if they refuse (because I have already returned as a customer) I would be sorely tempted to cancel my policy just so I can call up the next day and reissue it with the discounts.

Of course, the ENTIRE story here began when my policy waned and I would be tempting the same fate if I cancelled my policy for 24 hours. What do you think? Aren’t you just as curious as I am to see just how ridiculous this story can get?

I have to say that after ten months of co-parenting, things have gone pretty smoothly. I’m lucky enough to have an ex who is cooperative in all matters of coordinating our children’s lives. But this past week an issue has come up and it is something that has left me unsure of how to proceed. Read More...

Whenever I am near a professional photographer’s strobe lights when they go off, I feel an electrical charge rush up my spine to the base of my skull. Sometimes the feeling is quite painful. I have never had this sensation corroborated by anyone else.

You can amuse your child for 25 seconds by filling a bowl with water and sprinkling in black pepper. Place a single drop of dishwashing detergent in the water to watch the pepper flee to the edges of the bowl as if in fear.

In France, I am told, there is an expression that goes, “half your age plus seven.” It is used as a formula for determining if the person you are dating (if you are the older party) is too young or of a socially acceptable age.

In case you didn’t already realize, I’ve been enjoying reading quotes and aphorisms this week. Here is another one I liked...
“Christian morality prefers remorse to precede lust, and then lust not to follow.”
-Karl Kraus

I had a client in tears today because of a failed hard drive and no backup. Do you have a recent backup?

It is what you read when you don't have to that determines what you will be when you can't help it.
- Oscar Wilde

“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.”
-Anais Nin